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Chronic Pain and Illness

Chronic Pain – When People Don’t Believe You

6/5/2020

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Deuteronomy 31:6 – Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.
Chronic pain to me is indescribable pain that assaults my body all day and every day. There are good days when I can function in most situations. But there would seem to be far more bad days to endure.
 
But those good days make other people look at us like we really are just faking it. And then when a bad day comes along, they believe you can do more than you’re saying you can do.
 
What’s a person to do? It’s bad enough that we must live with this pain, but harder still when those around us don’t believe us. How much time and emotional energy does this kind of life require?
 
You want to cry, but you don’t because other people think you’re just depressed and can snap out of it.
 
  • You get angry and want to lash out at others, but then they think it’s not because we’re in pain but because we have anger management problems.
 
  • On the days when we wake up and can hardly move it’s easy to want to stay inside and not face the unbelieving world.
 
There’s one thing that turns it around. And I’m not saying I would wish it on anyone, but when one of your critics develops chronic pain they finally understand what you’re going through.
 
So how are you going to react? Are you going to join the crowd who now jeers someone else and let it be known that you don’t believe they’re in pain because they look okay?
 
You must do what others haven’t done for you:
 
  • Be compassionate and understanding.
  • Ask them if there’s anything you can do for them. Visit them and just sit next to them.
  • You don’t have to say a word, because inside them is a deep cry wishing for forgiveness because they had been so hard on you.
 
Painnewsnetwork.org in their article, “When Nobody Believes You,” discusses why people with chronic pain are misunderstood. There is a great deal of frustration because you must try to convince people that your pain is real. People will also discard your reasoning to see a doctor when you should just suck it up and live life as a healthy person. And sometimes, you give up the fight because nobody is going to believe you anyway.
 
But don’t give up. If the people around you don’t believe how serious your chronic pain condition is surround yourself with other people who do believe you. It takes a lot of energy to live your life from day-to-day. Don’t waste that energy on trying to convince someone you are telling the truth about your pain.
 
This takes a great deal of courage. But you don’t have to be afraid because God is always with you. He will always believe you and will never leave or forsake you. Take heart, the fight is long, but each day can bring a small victory which can build until you have a fortress of hope inside of you.
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    Karen Dalske is a freelance writer, public speaker, is active in her church and writes her blogs out of her own experiences of pain, illness and loss.

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