Empty Spaces in a Conversation

Job 12:13 - “To God belong wisdom and power; counsel and understanding are his.”

You’re in the middle of a conversation when your friend pauses. You wait for them to continue when the empty space becomes longer and longer. The space in the conversation remains unanswered which leads you to fill in the blanks whether they’re true or not.
 
Then your friend picks up your conversation, except, they now change to a totally different subject. It’s like there was something they were about to say, but decided not to.
 
But their change in direction leaves you with more unanswered questions, and you wonder if your friend has something to hide or the conversation was nearing a place where they were hurt in the past.
 
There are several important things to understand about the empty spaces:

1. Don’t take the space personally. There may be a very good reason why your friend needs a moment to collect their thoughts before moving on.
2. Don’t jump into that space and continue the conversation. The pause your friend has made is not so you can guess what they were going to say and say it for them.
3. Don’t grow impatient. Don’t look at your watch or your phone constantly. It may cause your friend to back off sharing something personal and that’s why the conversation will go in a totally different direction.
4. Don’t get distracted. That space that’s growing is doing just that. Growing. It needs a chance to bloom into words that will come after the empty space has reached its end.
5. Don’t take the rash move and leave the conversation. Don’t say a quick good-bye and leave. It’s important to let the conversation find its own end. Not your end.

 
Phoenixaustralia.org, in their article, “Helping Others,” lists ways you can help your family member or friend such as showing them that you are there to support them and when they are ready to talk you’ll be there for them understanding that they may get upset and you’ll need to choose a time to talk when they won’t be interrupted, or feel rushed or tired.
 
Also realize that you won’t be making that difficult conversation alone. God is the God of wisdom, power, counsel and understanding. He will gently guide you, because he knows that you want to help the person you care about. In addition, know that God will also guide the other person know just how deeply to reveal the hurt they are experiencing. Together, you both may be ready to fill in the empty spaces in your conversation, and move on.

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