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Emotional pain and Loss

Life is Full of Disappointments but There’s Always Two Sides

5/31/2019

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Romans 15:5 – May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you the same attitude of mind toward each other that Christ Jesus had.
Disappointment. It’s here again.
 
It may hurt when disappointment greets us at the door, but it doesn’t have to permanently live with us. It’s all about attitude.
 
When we ask someone to do something for us and they back out or say “no”, we can let it simmer underneath the surface. We may act like it doesn’t bother us. Many times though, disappointment builds. However, we must examine the other person’s situation:
 
  • They may want to help you, but circumstances are such that they have to do something else.
  • They may just be in a pinch for time.
  • They may be waiting for you to ask them the next time you need help, but you’ve assumed they don’t want to help you.
  • They may not know how to help you.
  • They may even feel badly about letting you down.
 
Don’t close that person out of your life. Life is full of two sides. We’ve all experienced both needing help and being ready to help. Let’s take a look at this:
 
  • When you let someone down did they show you grace? Then show them grace as well when they let you down.
  • When you were in a pinch for time, did you make sure they understood and let them know you’d be available later?
  • When you didn’t know how to help someone else, did you ask them to describe what it was they wanted you to do?
  • When you let someone down did you feel badly and let them know you were sorry you couldn’t help?
 
When someone needs help it can be confusing to know how to help. This in turn can lead to disappointment. Kristineinbetween.com in their article, “How to Deal When Friends Disappoint You,” has some thoughts on the subject. They suggest that disappointments are often a result of not having your expectations met. It’s important to acknowledge your feelings when you’re disappointed, and speak your mind with grace. Tell them exactly how the disappointment affected you and why you feel the way you do.
 
Here’s another thought: We must remember to take a look at the situation from all sides. If we don’t, disappointment will begin to eat away at our heart and our relationships with other people. It may help to ask the friend who can’t help you if they know someone who might be able to. Getting someone new’s help may open the door to a new friendship. So keep that attitude in check.
 
Remember to keep in mind the attitude that Jesus had. He was willing to lay down his life for his friends. We may not be asked to lay down our life, but we may be asked to lay down our disappointments, and be thankful instead. God will indeed give you the endurance to live your life as one who forgives others when they let them down, and help you lend a hand to someone else.
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    Karen Dalske is a freelance writer, public speaker, is active in her church and writes her blogs out of her own experiences of pain, illness and loss.

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