Psalm 69:20 - Scorn has broken my heart and has left me helpless; I looked for sympathy, but there was none, for comforters, but I found none.
You stoop down and crouch at the foot of your bed in the darkness. Preferring it rather than walking out your door and around other people.
Your heart is breaking. You try your best each day to do all that you can, but for some people it’s never enough. They see you as a failure, because you fight depression; unable to cope with any amount of stress. And after all, only a weak person would feel this way.
To top it all off the person who spoke such mean statements has openly disliked you even when around other people, and they’ve shown you nothing but disrespect and indignation.
Scorn. It’s all those things and more.
How could someone have such feelings of anger and disgust leaking from their mouth all day long? It’s like they wear their contempt toward you like a long black robe.
I have felt the scorn from others like hot coals upon my soul many times. No matter what I say. No matter what I do. No matter how kind I am to the other person, the scorn and derision they show me just burns stronger.
Living life with depression is not just a matter of what you have to deal with each day; it’s also a matter of how others view your day. Some days I can sense the support of the few friends that know my past, but many times, as I’m out in the world, I can’t find anyone to comfort and support me. And I feel helpless.
What I can do to help me feel less helpless about the scorn I receive from someone is to understand that scorn can quickly turn someone into a toxic personality; filled with years of anger and disappointment about their lives.
Find a list of things the toxic person does and how to deal with them from heysigmund.com in their article, “Toxic People: 12 Things They do and How to Deal with Them,” such as being aware of how toxic people can manipulate those around them.
It’s difficult to do it, but you must realize that the scorn that is coming your way isn’t your fault. As the Bible verse above states, when scorn has broken your heart and left you helpless and you can’t find anyone to sympathize with you, realize that God will always hear your cry for help and will be the comfort that you so desperately need.
Karen Dalske is a freelance writer, public speaker, is active in her church and writes her blogs out of her own experiences of pain, illness and loss.